I‘m freakin’ superman. Or at least I thought I was until I had a meltdown last week. With boogers in my eyes and a t-shirt that I’m pretty sure screamed I should’ve been washed weeks ago, I threw my arms around my fluffy hotel pillow and yelled into it.
I felt like Lex Murphy in Jurassic Park. One second I’m relieved eating jello, shooting the breeze with John Hammond. And the next, all hell breaks loose as the t-rex I’ve been trying to avoid stomps closer and closer.
Jello starts to jiggle and the fear of God overtakes my body. I can hear it breathing now and one second later I’m standing in front of it, staring it right between the eyes. Only I’m not facing a man eating t-rex, I’m looking into the eyes of the life ahead of me. It’s terrifying and it’s ready to bite my head off.
Okay, I’m being a tad bit dramatic.
Life is not a tyrannosaurus rex and I haven’t had jello in years. But it is TERRIFYING.
And when we really have time to sit and think about our lives, our minds tend to place periods at the ends of sentences we take too long to finish. And uncompleted tasks and unreached goals have a way of floating around in our heads as constant reminders of our inability to keep up with our overambitious selves. They whisper to us, “failure…failure…failure”.
And very often we listen. Buying into the lie that we can’t do it. And the truth is,
Just not all at once. Not all today. As humans we always have these long lists to scratch off in our heads and hashtag goals to become and 3 month business plans to accomplish and we start to believe this weird sort of fantasy that everything good in our lives is supposed to magically fall into place overnight.
Not all at once is a strategic business plan, attending networking events and meetings over coffee and meetings with strangers and meetings with friends who may become investors and contract mockups and late night conference calls, and traveling with lost luggage and finding someone to design a logo and someone to run the numbers and someone to tell you no you shouldn’t say yes to that price and-
Not all at once isn’t hashtag goals but a dating life that takes time to develop with phone calls and notes scribbled on the backs of napkins and let me pick you up in my car and drop you off before midnight and lets go hiking or let’s do nothing, together. What’s your favorite color and what do you hate the most about the world but what do you love about it too? Finding good in the bad. And not letting the bad ruin the good.
Not all at once is allowing yourself to have a realistic expectation of time. It’s learning what it means to pace yourself and keep your eyes on the finish line without getting burned out. It’s allowing yourself time to take a break, when needed, as often as needed. Eating ice cream, a whole pint. Jogging in the rain. Getting a massage. Laughing so hard your belly hurts. Going to the movies alone. Seeing the world, one overseas trip at a time.