All Used Up

Photo by Hernan Sanchez

I wanted to write some sort of flowery feel good post about fall. Because let’s face it, who doesn’t love the season of ugly ugg boots and ratty grandpa sweaters? If you don’t love fall I’m pretty sure we can’t be friends. This is the season of cozy, all wrapped up, not going no where for nobody season. An introverts dream. MY dream.

Anyways that was supposed to be the point of this post. But I can’t sit here and lie to my readers. 

Truth is I wanna be cozy wrapped up in sweaters sippin’ hot cocoa til my lips turn blue. But I can’t seem to chill. I want to be everywhere and nowhere at the same time. Doesn’t make sense I know but that’s how I feel. 

I feel like I write about this over and over but I’ll keep venting to this online journal of sorts until it writes itself away. 

The mind is a very powerful tool, that can also be used as a weapon. Your negative thoughts can creep in and turn your mind against you in a matter of seconds. Once a faithful friend, now a backstabbing foe. The mind maps out his plan of attacks. Laying them on one at a time, day by day. Until you wake up and don't recognize who you see in the mirror anymore.

"Who is that person?" You whisper to yourself. Only to see that the reflection mimics exactly what you do.

That reflection IS you. 

So, you don't like what you see huh? Me either. Which can only mean it’s time to take steps towards some change, towards some good ole’ fashion soul cleansing:

1. Watch what you feed your soul

There is so much darkness in the world. Really there is. You don’t have to search to find it. It crawls through your twitter feed and it’s sprinkled throughout your next favorite Netflix binge. Don’t feed from it though. Don’t let it fuel your day. 

2. It’s okay to take it slow

When there are days you can’t seem to make it out of bed, don’t punish yourself for it. Take care of your body and love your body. Listen to it. Eat when your hungry and sleep when your tired. 

3. You don’t have to be okay all of the time

I’m the best when it comes to faking a smile. THE ABSOLUTE BEST I SHOULD WIN AN ACADEMY AWARD. But seriously, stop. Faking it will make you even more tired and more worn out and more tired of the world you live in. Learn how to be more transparent with the people in your life who are willing to listen (I’m learning this too).

4. You are not on this earth to please everyone.

So STOP. 

5. Make time for yourself. 

Last night I put in a Pixar movie and grubbed on popcorn and jalapeno peppers. I’m more than okay with this and will not apologize for it. 

So this post is a little bit all over the place. But thank you for bearing with me. Thank you for peeking in on a little bit of my soul. Remember to take of yourself.

Remember that when your all used up, there's peace to be found in rest.